All you need to know is “Raquel!” stars Raquel Welch and was “filmed on location in London, Paris, Acapulco, Mexico City, Big Sur, Sun Valley, Yucatan, and Los Angeles!” She sings. She dances. And Bob Mackie designed the costumes. Prepare yourself to step into a time capsule that is so quintessentially 1970.

“Raquel!” starts off with Raquel singing “Games People Play” during the opening credits then dissolves into “California Dreamin’,” filmed with Raquel exploring the famous sites of Paris. As I noted, the costumes in “Raquel!” were created by the legendary designer Bob Mackie, who certainly had his work cut out for him in this made-for-TV musical extravaganza. For the Mamas and the Papas cover, Raquel is adorned in a low-key red cape with black trim. Though, halfway through the song, the tone and location change as she is transported to Mexico where she does some far-out space dancing to an instrumental drum soundtrack. Suited up in a silver bikini, Raquel is joined by a couple of gyrating astronauts. But, faster than you can say “bad acid,” we’re back in Paris where Raquel closes out “California Dreamin’.”

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Shot by Academy Award-winning cinematographer Vilmos Zsigmond as a modern re-imagining of early silent film, LOUIS is an homage to Louis Armstrong, Charlie Chaplin, beautiful women and the birth of American music. The grand Storyville bordellos, alleys and cemeteries of 1907 New Orleans provide a backdrop of lust, blood and magic for 6 year old Louis (Anthony Coleman) as he navigates the colorful intricacies of life in the city. Young Louis's dreams of playing the trumpet are interrupted by a chance meeting with a beautiful and vulnerable girl named Grace (Lowry) and her baby, Jasmine. Haley, in a performance reminiscent of the great comic stars of the silent screen, plays the evil Judge Perry who is determined not to let Jasmine's true heritage derail his candidacy for governor.

After honking her horn, Alfie (Sir Michael Caine) takes his leave of his make out partner, Siddie (Millicent Martin), to speak directly to the camera about his latest conquest, who incidentally is married with low self-esteem. Ready for more action, Alfie winks at a stray dog on the street and hops back in the car. Upon dropping Siddie off where she will meet up with her husband, Alfie heads home to his “standby,” Gilda (Julia Foster). Lower middle class Gilda loves Alfie, though he doesn’t even like her. He’s bossy and rude to her while she adores him. And she’s pregnant. Yikes!

She wants to have the baby and give it up for adoption “to a rich lady,” but Alfie doesn’t want the headache. To takes his mind off things, he sleeps with the manageress of a Dry Cleaners, a woman from a foot comfort service, a mother, and a stranger in a park. In his spare time, Alfie announces that he believes in helping himself at the expense of others, as he steals a tank of gas.

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Loosely based on the series of Matt Helm novels by Donald Hamilton, “The Silencers” features Dean Martin as erstwhile counter agent Matt Helm. Not to be confused with the counter agent at Northwest who lost my luggage last week. Helm isn’t a secret agent who spies and stuff, he just causes problems for other spies. Which is good work if you can get it. Helm was formerly with the organization I.C.E. (Intelligence and Counter Espionage).

Released within months of the premiere of his popular long-running TV show, “The Dean Martin Comedy Hour” in 1966, “The Silencers” is the first of four films starring Dean Martin as Matt Helm. Highly successful when released, “The Silencers” was followed the same year by “Murderer’s Row,” in the next year by “The Ambushers,” and two years later in “The Wrecking Crew” from 1969.

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The first memory I have of Jane Fonda is from watching my mother’s copy of Jane Fonda’s 1982 exercise video, aptly titled “Workout,” based on Fonda‘s even more aptly titled LP “Jane Fonda‘s Workout Record.“ Hot off the heels of early ‘80s HBO mainstays “Nine to Five” and “On Golden Pond,” Fonda appeared on the video box in leg warmers and promised music by REO Speedwagon, Billy Ocean, and Boz Scaggs. Based on her dowdy appearance in “Nine to Five” and her whiny semi-autobiographical role in “On Golden Pond,” I hadn’t realized Fonda had been a sex symbol until years later when I rented a copy of Barbarella on VHS.

It is the year 40,000 and Barbarella is hot on the trail of Durand Durand and his missing Positronic Ray. Follow along and I’ll answer such questions as: Can Barbarella rescue Durand Durand before the Black Queen destroys him? Will Barbarella out-pleasure the Excessive Machine? Have STDs been cured 38,000 years from now or does Barbarella just have really low self-esteem?

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